Life Lemonade!

What is Life Lemonade you may ask?

Well, its something inside of you, its the decision to make life all its worth and learn to appreciate all of the ups and downs through this journey of life. Because that’s what life is … a journey, never ending, and always surprising.

So how this “life lemonade” came along was Evan and I being stupid together after a really rough week I was having. If your my friend on Facebook or Instagram you probably saw that I lost two very special family members within less than a week apart. On  Sunday I lost my Uncle Chris who has always been there for me, accepting me for whoever I choose to be and just a really humble and kindhearted big ol’ teddy bear. No warning signs, only 58 and they determined it was a heart attack. Then, if that wasn’t enough to throw me off balance a little…. My Aunt Karey went for her normal morning run and collapsed, by the time the paramedics got to her, she was gone. Again no warning signs, 51 and her heart was 2x its size ( what a thing to die from eh? too big of a heart) which is literally what this woman had, she was rather more like a second mother to me. Babysitting my cousins growing up, sending me home with food after every visit and just being such a wonderful.. well, big hearted and loving person in general…. and quite honestly, I don’t really know how else to look at this besides that they obviously needed each other ….(Same side of the family, brother and sister)

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So after losing it a few times with some really deep crying (  and boy, you realize how mature and older you’re getting when you can actually embrace those kinds of emotions) Evan and I got to talking about life … and I was off in my own little world just thinking, letting my wheels turn and I laughed and said “when life CHUCKS you some lemons”…. and Evans response couldn’t have been any more perfect at the time…..

This is what he said,  ” you take those little fuckers,  smash the shit out of them and you make yourself some god damn lemonade…. then what do you do? You drink that shit down.. and you call it LIFE! .. Life Lemonade” and by this time I was a crying laughing mess haha. Which was ok.

So with everything happening, letting it sink in, fighting and embracing the emotions taking over along with just accepting the reality of how precious life really is… I kind of just said “Fuck it” to myself. DONT worry, not in a bad way, but rather good way. …a “why not?” moment if you will. . . . .

What I’m trying to say here is.. why are we so scared to embrace new, embrace change, or the climb. We get caught up in our habits, get comfortable and never grow, we make excuses for certain challenges we face and try to either blame it on circumstances, lack of money, help, motivation…whatever it is we keep telling ourselves. Its all bullshit lol. Life is precious so why not do what you want, be with the people you need and learn to embrace the struggle. Why do we hold back? Why do we care what other people think, believe or determine what’s good or bad for us? and the truth is, even if it is a bad decision, you end up learning from it, so was it really all that bad? Or did it make you a stronger individual? Think about it, life is about choices and every choice you make leads you to your next one … and its ultimately up to YOU on how you want to LIVE your life. No one else’s. You are the only YOU and no one can be that nor take it away from you.

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We are always so supportive others, wanting the best for them, offering help and wanting others to see the potential inside themselves, when we have a hard time doing that very thing for ourselves. Were so willing to give SO much love to others when we have the hardest time loving ourselves. We see the flaws in others and love them even though they may have some rough edges or a little extra baggage, we see their imperfections as just a part of who they are.Why cant we do that for ourselves? Learn to view yourself from the outside looking in, you’re special and beautiful all in your very own way.

So I guess not only has this trauma of the past week shut me down for a little bit, caused hurt and still does.. I don’t expect it to just fade away tomorrow, but instead I accept it for what it is and allow it to make me stronger. Which it has, and will continue to do so. You can look life dead in the eye, be terrified of the possibilities, let the doubts of others control your decisions, dreams and life….  or be excited and maybe a little scared too and realize you only get one chance to do WHATEVER you want to!

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Life isn’t meant to be easy,we all know that. So suck it up buttercup, its all about perspective. Challenges and situations will come at you and you may not like then or know even what to do about them ,but it all depends on if you face each one as they come. You can complain about the challenge, situation and let it tear you apart, cause stress or pain, or you can take action to find another way around it and find the beauty inside the struggle. The struggle is the climb and the climb is where your inner strength is at. You’re not going to wake up one day and have all your dreams come true, your going to have to work though the ups and downs,have the failures to appreciate the triumphs and work everyday to active whatever dreams are. You may not even know what your dreams are yet ( hell, I don’t know fully yet either) and thats ok, but you mustn’t let it stop you or keep you from moving forward.

Do what you want. Live the life you want. and Love yourself through it all.

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